Mar 232013
 

So many things are going on in my head right now. I’ve been reading teh interwebs for two days straight and I’m feeling like my dislike for people in general is justified. Of course, ‘teh interwebs’ (sic) is where the trolls live so I’m probably being unjust if I base the whole of humanity on a few, but still.

What made me write this post is a thread I read on an IMDb forum regarding the film ‘Monsters’ [2010] written and directed by Gareth Edwards and shot for around $15,000. It’s an awesome movie considering the low budget.

Filmed on a Sony EX3 with a Nikon 50 MM Lens the director used natural light almost exclusively except for a couple of tiny LED lights for when it was pitch black. The effects were done in Adobe CS4 and the editing in Premiere. The majority of filming was shot with just a sound guy, the director and the 2 main leads. Most of the extras were locals and a lot of the scenes and locations were shot opportunistically.

Awesome! But by fuck were the trolls out to get this one on the forums.

I replied recently to another thread on another site I use to people who were criticising a short animation. Most of them were not criticising the story or the characters, they were criticising the actual cinematography and the techniques used. This was on a gaming site.

My comment was simply; “if you can do better go out and do it. If not, have respect for the man that did. If you actually have the skill to do a better job and think that the film maker could have done things better or improve on his technique, send the director an email and offer to help him.”

Constructive criticism is welcomed by all. I know I welcomed it as a photographer. If someone obviously had more talent than me I learnt from them if I could and listened to what they had to say. I ignored the ‘I could do that’ trolls. If they could, they would’ve and I would be copying them

The two things that got to me on the ‘Monsters’ forum were 1) the thread criticising the lead male for portraying a professional photographer badly and 2) criticising him (the photojournalist) for going with the girl (that he didn’t know) in the first place (into territory infected by the ‘Monsters’ of the title).

Amongst the many reasons Scoot McNairy was criticised for playing a photojournalist badly was that in one of the last scenes he just stands and watches the monsters rather than shooting them (with his camera). That led me to thinking about the incident I was involved with only two days past. And. Bear in mind I ‘am’ (or was) a professional photographer.

20 March 2013. I was on the King Harry Ferry (a chain ferry) crossing the river Fal when I watched a car roll off of the concrete slipway, onto the riverbank and stop with it’s front wheels in the water. I was on the opposite side of the Fal. The driver, an elderly male had apparently (I was later to learn) stepped out of his car to take a photo and either didn’t apply the handbrake properly or the handbrake failed. As of writing there hasn’t been any more information.

The driver and one other male seemed to dither about by the car, one of them wandered back across the slipway to a moored and beached dinghy with an outboard before sauntering back. Neither male looked overtly worried in so much as they weren’t about to get their feet wet. As we (the people on the ferry) watched, the car began to slide into the water. The driver looked panicked and the skipper of the ferry was already on the radio and the phone to the emergency services. A manager from the ferry company had got into a small boat and was making his way across the river towards the scene of the accident.

A disabled woman was trapped in the car! With two dogs. As it slipped under the water.

When the ferry was about thirty feet from where the car had probably settled underwater I was begging the guy in the boat above the car to throw me a rope so that I could dive down and see what I could do for the woman in the car. He refused and refused. I begged. His reasoning was that the water was too deep, 25/30 feet at that point, and that the visibility was nil and that the river was tidal. I knew it would be too dangerous without some kind of safety line myself and was feeling awful and frantic that I wanted to help but wasn’t being allowed to.

When it was obvious that the ferry could dock and cause no more difficulties to the car it pulled onto the slipway and having the only four wheel drive with a tow bar (I drive a Land Rover) I figured that if a rope could be hooked onto the car I might be able to tow it out of the river. The guy on the small boat was desperately trying to hook the car, which he couldn’t see, and was only approximately sure of it’s location, with his anchor. If he could manage it, I could try to tow it.

Two inshore lifeboats arrived. Neither having a diver they agreed that trying to hook the car with an anchor and me towing it was probably the best idea available at that time.

Two offshore lifeboats and a helicopter arrived but still no diver. The best shot was a local mussel ‘free’ diver named Matt Vernon, (a fucking hero!) he spent ages in just a wetsuit, mask, snorkel and fins diving down in the nil visibility, and near freezing water trying his best to get some kind of line on the car. At one point he did and the line was tied to my car by the coastguard on the shore and I was instructed where to drive and how slow. I moved perhaps 15/20 feet before the car got stuck (I was later told) on the ferry chain and my clutch began to burn out.

The rope was then tied to the winch of a fire engine and at that point it couldn’t tow the car out of the water either.

This was perhaps three quarters of an hour after the car had gone into the water with the woman.

This is a précis of the whole story. There had also been an off duty policeman directing traffic, a community police officer trying to co-ordinate things on shore. The ferry standing offshore with two ambulances and a fire engine. A fire engine on the submerged cars side of the water with two coastguard trucks, four police cars and an ambulance.

Including the emergency services on the opposite side of the river, on the river and in the air there were eighteen vehicles. Not one of them had a trained and equipped diver.

Cornwall has the most coastline of any UK county and this local region, Carrick, is one of it’s most coastal with tourism and fishing both playing a major role. The nearest major town; Falmouth (along with the Carrick Roads area where the river Fal and river Percuil meet) has the third deepest natural harbour in the world.

EIGHTEEN emergency vehicles, at a coastal emergency, and not one diver.

Again, this is a précis. I struggle to think about that afternoon and have prayed for the man that lost his wife and dogs. For the woman that died and for the dogs and for all that were involved and that might be feeling a little raw for their involvement.

As a man, I hope I did everything I could to help. I beat myself up for not getting into the water and forcing the issue of the ferry guy giving me a rope but I know he did the right thing by refusing; while I was giving a statement to the police the officer said that the only thing more galling than losing someone to an incident like this (and he’d never, in ten years been to an incident like this) was losing two people when the person that tried to help ended up dying too. It’s a sobering thought.

As a photographer. As the only photographer on the incident side of the river. I actually considered being able to get photos that no other journalist would be able to get and wondered the financial value of said photos…

Ultimately, I decided against it. As a photographer I decided against it. This wasn’t a tsunami or 9/11 where the disaster was worldwide news. This was a local, personal tragedy and as such my role was to help and not to document a media event that would not have world wide ramifications and photography would not be part of it’s history.

Thinking about the forum comment that sparked this blog post, unless you’re there, unless you’re a photographer you have no idea how you’re going to react to a situation or whether you feel the need to document it. By saying that ‘not taking photos’ is a bad representation of a photojournalist the troll has no idea. I was there and I didn’t take photos. To not take photos shows humanity in some situations and an actors job is to be as naturally human as possible.

Troll… You have been pwned!

As for item #2. Why did the photojournalist decide to go cross country (across a monster infected area) with a girl that he’d just met?

I’d like to think that all things being equal. In that situation, I might make that decision too. Like Luke Rhinehart. The ‘Diceman’, sometimes you have to throw the dice and take a risk. Even if the dice are metaphorical, sometimes you have to roll them and do something unexpected. As the events of the 20th have shown, life is too often, too short. We have no idea when ours will run out and one has to make the most of each moment. One minute you can be admiring the scenery and within ten minutes either yourself or your family and pets can be dead.

Dead is forever. This moment, this life is fleeting. Even your allotted eighty or so years, seen in perspective, in time, is but an eye-blink. What percentage is your allotted life, of time that has gone before, since the beginning of time until the end of time with the implosion of the universe? It is an infinitesimally small amount of time. That’s all you have, all you will ever have and you don’t even know how long that time is.

Live! Live in the moment. Live for today. Take risks, take calculated gambles and live. Experience life. Enjoy life and if you don’t, find a way to. Find someone to share it with. Take a risk and talk to the girl you feel you’ll have no chance with because the chances are she feels just as insecure as you do. Take that walk in the countryside. Stop and smell the flowers. Play with your kids and pets. Take a holiday. Spend some money recklessly, swim in the ocean, hike cross country. Talk to a stranger. Look out to sea and smell the salt. Tell your folks you love them, eat ice-cream in the winter, try sushi for the first time. Just fucking enjoy and experience life because it is too fucking short not to.

Why did the journalist go cross-country with a girl he’d just met (but probably fancied)? Because he could!


Feb 122012
 

When asked what the best camera was, Pulitzer prize winning photojournalist Barry Staver said, “It’s the one you have with you.” Photographer Chase Jarvis liked the quote so much he went out with his iPhone and created a book, an app and a website around it. Recently, ‘living legend’ Annie Leibovitz called the iPhone 4S “the snapshot camera of today.”

I’ve already said myself how owning one and using one has rekindled my love for photography. The iPhone’s simplicity rocks! It only has one button; shoot. If you want more, more you can have in the way of apps; Camera+ gives you shoot, focus and exposure. You can edit on the fly and post your photos to all of your social media sites or keep them to yourself in the Camera Roll.

Annie Leibovitz described the iPhone as accessible, easy and the modern version of the “wallet with the family pictures in it”.

Grrr to the fucking gadget!! Fuck Apple and fuck Steve Jobs. I resisted the whole iPhone thing for so long until ultimately I saw the photos a 4S could take and I wanted one. So much thought has been put into the camera. There are rumours, that knowing how important a part of the iPhone the camera is, Jobs was in talks with the Lytro inventor Ren Ng about including the Lytro technology in a future rendition of the iPhone.

I could have waited until the iPhone 5, and then waited until 6 then 7. I’d have waited forever. It’s called procrastination, so I climbed aboard the 4S. And now. Now. The fucking thing has taken over my life a little. So much so that I’ve gotten a little responsibility back and started to blog again.

That’s right, blogging is part of the Neolestat experience and it isn’t updating a Facebook status. It’s a small step forward. I’ve started a 365 photography project and I have ‘productivity’ apps. All down to an 8mp, f2.4 gadget, phone aside.

Problem is though, at heart I’m an artist and in the real world, f2.4 should give you some smidgen of creativity. A little depth of field as it were. But, with such a small lens, what was I expecting? As a photographer and as an artist I’m always looking for more. I love taking snapshots but I also love creating images that fall within the realms of art; images that have effect, technique, colour, and composition. I bought my first DSLR so that I could add depth of field to my images. That’s a fact. A DSLR purely to be able to incorporate depth of field into my photography.

So, seeing as the iPhone is going to be my goto camera until some modicum of success means I have the spare change to be able to go out and buy a Leica M10 and the new Canon 1Ds X I need a way to improve on the iPhone’s ‘kit’ lens as it were: It’s with the Olloclip that I mean to do this.

Olloclip

The Olloclip

Designed by Patrick O’Neill the Olloclip is a 3-in-1 quick-connect lens solution for the iPhone 4/4S that includes a fish-eye, wide-angle and macro lenses that work with both the still and video cameras. Made from CNC machined aircraft grade aluminium, precision ground glass and soft plastic the Olloclip isn’t a cheap lens solution but it’s certainly the best and worth every penny. As a Kickstarter project people had faith in it as a blueprint alone and so far its funding is at 454% of the original figure asked. It seems that Kickstarter is the place to go to fund an iPhone project… Hang on a minute while I register!

Cleverly designed to be one product rather than 3 separate lenses banging about in a pocket or bag the Olloclip is fashioned to clip on and off the iPhone with ease and is engineered to be foolproof with regard to lining up the lenses. It’s soft plastic body means that no matter how many times you slide it on or off the phone you are never going to damage the glass front or back. Like the previously reviewed product; the Glif, the Olloclip is designed to work on a caseless iPhone so for an all in one tripod and lens solution the Olloclip and Glif are an ideal pairing.

To operate the Olloclip, simply slide it onto the iPhone and enjoy the wonderful fish-eye lens with it’s approximate 180 Degree field-of-view and shoot some rad and gnarly skateboard trickery! Or don’t. I just threw that old cliché in for the sick boarders that want a convenient solution that doesn’t weigh them down. As with even the most expensive cameras and fish-eye lenses there is a certain amount of vignetting, don’t hate on it, love it. It’s part of what makes shooting fish-eye so much fun.

When you tire of all that fish-eye goodness, slide the Olloclip off, turn it around and slide it back on. Wide-angle for the win. Tire of that, unscrew the wide-angle lens and you have a perfectly functioning x10 macro-lens. What I do assure you of, is that with three options you’ll never tire of using them all and the standard iPhone lens will seem just that; standard.

Raisin Muffin

Giving Birth to a Raisin (Olloclip macro) Shot and edited with Camera+

Measuring about 20mm (0.78 in) across on average, weighing only 20 grams or 0.7 of an ounce, having lens caps for the wide-angle and fish-eye lenses and coming with a micro fibre cleaning cloth that handily doubles up as a carrying bag a there’s absolutely no reason to leave home without it and more to the fact you’ll probably find that you look for excuses to leave home with it. You’ll become a keen landscape photographer, an URBEX photographer or most importantly you’ll get that fish-eye on, dust off your skateboard and get grinding again.

I can’t gush about the Olloclip enough. For my Canon 1Ds Mark II I only had three lenses. I had the 24-70 f2.8L, the 70-200 f2.8L and the 85mm f1.2L. Now I have three lenses for my iPhone and didn’t have to spend in excess of £5800 ($9140 with today’s currency exchange rate). With an Olloclip attached I’m a happy iPhoneographer!

Skateboard Deck

Longboard Truck (Olloclip fish-eye) Shot and edited with Camera+

Feb 072012
 

I said this on Facebook and no-one bothered to comment, so, either, I have no friends or perhaps it’s one of those “Doh! Did you imagine any different?” comments, but, since buying my first iPhone, a 4S, I can’t imagine life without it.

It won’t ever roll a cigarette for me but it’s enough that I can Facebook and Twitter in front of the TV without having my PC in my lap. It’s got a timer that helps me cook and I do enjoy a bit of Angry Birds. However… Although it seemingly syncs my whole PC; music, photos, films, books, notes and calendar it’s the camera that amuses me the most.

Not completely surprising, seeing that I’m a photographer, but I am utterly surprised at A) how good the camera is (I bought a Nokia N8 purely because on paper it had the best camera on a cellphone, I was underwhelmed!) and B) how it seems to have completely rekindled my love for photography.

I love the quality of the images and I love the apps; Camera+, Hipstamatic, Instagram, TiltShift, 8mm, Shoebox, Vintage Cam and PS (Photoshop) Express. I love that I can take a photo, edit it on the phone and immediately post it up on Facebook or Twitter. I can fire up Hipstamatic, give the phone a shake to randomise the film, lens and flash combo, aim the camera, press the shutter button and immediately I have a Holga/Diana style photo without the need for either sending a medium format film off for developing or doing some serious Photoshop editing on my PC.

What’s not to love?

Oh… The iPhone is tiny, it doesn’t feel like a substantial camera in your hand. It doesn’t have a 1/4-20 UNC thread to attach it to a tripod head, it doesn’t stand up on it’s own easily even though Apple gave you the option to use the supplied headphones as a remote shutter button.

Although it has a digital zoom, it doesn’t have a macro mode, nor a wide angle mode nor a fish eye lens. If you drop an iPhone it’s more likely to break than your average prosumer camera and if you use the camera for more than fifteen minutes you’d better take a way to recharge it on the fly.

Have you ever tried to watch a movie or catch-up TV on your iPhone? Did you wander around the house looking for a non-slippery surface to stand the phone on? Did you try balancing the phone against a banana for the optimum viewing angle? Did you look for a portable non-slip surface AND a banana so that you could watch catch-up TV in bed? Did you wish that there was a better way? Did you wish that better way was also a 1/4-20 UNC thread so that you could watch TV or shoot photos with your iPhone attached to a tripod? I did.

You did too? But for the life of you couldn’t find a solution… Enter the Glif+ the solution you’ve been searching for!

The Glif

The Glif

Made by Studio Neat and being a Kickstarter success project, the Glif is made from recyclable rubberized plastic and is basically an iPhone 4/4S accessory with two primary functions: Mounting your iPhone onto a tripod and propping up your iPhone at various angles. It’s small enough to fit snugly in your pocket or backpack. It has a 1/4″-­20 thread that fits any standard tripod or camera mount. The Glif is designed to work with a “naked” (caseless) iPhone.

Glif Stand

The Glif as a stand

Additionally (and the package I have) the Glif+ comes with the Serif which will keep your phone safe in more extreme situations. When you are not using the Serif, it fits snugly inside the Glif, making it very compact.  Also the Glif+ comes with the Ligature, a simple keyring loop that attaches to the tripod thread on the Glif.

The Serif

The Glif and The Serif

If you have £19 ($30 at the time of press), burning a hole in your pocket, forget buying more apps and buy yourself a physical product. Buy the Glif+. Us iPhone users are all the same; I’m guessing that you’re never really more than a room away from your phone and I have to say that now my phone is never more than a room away from it’s new best buddy; the Glif.

As a stand for watching movies, catch-up TV or FaceTime it clips on and off in seconds and is far better than a banana for getting the viewing angle spot on. As a tripod mount it clips on and off in seconds and even with the Serif attached (which I have tried safely with a Gorillapod tripod clipped to my bike) it is small enough and secure enough to allow for charging and/or using the headphones as a remote shutter button which is crucial if you want to avoid camera shake and which is surely the whole point of a tripod mount? That is, unless you’re lazy like me and while lying in bed, on your back, use a small Gorillapod perched on your chest to watch BBC iPlayer…

In summary; The Glif+ isn’t the best £19 I’ve spent in my life, (that was for a hand-job in the back room of a strip joint by a red-headed teen with awesome boobs) but it sure comes a close second. The Glif is better than a banana and I for one wouldn’t be without it now.

Get one… You know you want to!

Dec 062011
 

What do you call a Professional Photographer without a camera? I was going to start this missive with a sentence containing the phrase ‘ex-photographer’ but somehow that didn’t work for me. Ex-photographer implies (to me at least) that I no longer ‘wish’ to be a photographer. That I am never going to take another picture or ever pick up a camera again.

Truth is; I am a Professional Photographer without the means to take a photograph. To push that truth a little further; I am also an artist without the means of creating art.

Times are hard the world over. Switch on the TV and one is bombarded with adverts asking you to help impoverished children in Africa, people the world over without food or clean water, mistreated animals and today I saw an advert asking me to help the victims of child marriages.

In the Western World it is almost impossible for first-time buyers to get on the housing ladder although house prices are at an all time low. Gold prices have been as high as they’ve ever been yet the common-person does not have the money to invest, rather, judging by the amount of adverts, people are being actually being urged to sell their gold (to survive). The rich get richer! Inflation rises. The cost of food and fuels rise almost daily and now, because of the recent flooding in Thailand, hard-drive prices are set to soar, thus driving up the price of computing again.

Those same times that are hard globally are also being hard locally; having said that I’m a Professional Photographer without a camera it makes perfect sense that I’m incapable of earning a living as a photographer.

In fact, since moving to Cornwall, whether because of my terrible marketing skills, a run of bad luck or my refusal to work as anything other than a portrait photographer I have only had one paid gig. Even that was sold at a fraction of the price that my last London job cost the client.

I am a photographer without a camera because living in Cornwall, as I do, as many others do, requires a circus full of skills; One has to constantly juggle money and possessions. It is a fine balancing act to keep ones head above water, one is constantly trying to escape from poverty, one has to tame ones debtors and one constantly hides behind the tears of a clown.

The constant juggling of finances is the hardest. Rent, food, water, electricity, heating, pet bills, travel, broadband connection, cell phone, TV license, addictions and quality of life: Rent, because luckily I live in a hovel, is covered. As to the rest? The water board have taken me to court. Luckily, they are the one service that can’t disconnect you. Food is juggled with electricity is juggled with heating is juggled with the broadband etc. It is ALWAYS food vs. pet bills, pet bills vs. electricity, electricity vs. travel, travel vs. cell phone, cell phone vs. addictions or addictions vs. quality of life. There is NEVER enough money to go around. There is NEVER a time when all of ones needs (according to Maslow) are covered entirely and comfortably.

Hence the fact I’m a photographer without a camera. To survive. To SURVIVE, I’ve had to sell it.

Since I came to Cornwall I’ve lost virtually everything; My physical health has deteriorated, my mental health has deteriorated. My mother has stopped talking to me, she will continue this to her death bed as her own mother did to her, my relationship with my father is strained and all my sundry family with the exception of my daughter and sister refuse to have anything to do with me.

I have lost my girlfriend of six years (along with my laptop and cordless drill) to another man and at least sixty percent of my friends are no longer friends.

To survive Cornwall I have sold: My £600+ ($960) mountain bike, my canoe, my Xbox 360 and games, my DVD collection, excess current generation video games I would like to have kept but no longer played, my entire collection of retro consoles and games dating from the eighties to the current generation (some of which will be forever irreplaceable), the gold chain I got for my twenty-first birthday, my car, a collection of rare Japanese toys and dolls, a hand forged Samurai sword, a Canon GL2 professional video camera, two pairs of Elinchrom Style RX 600 strobes and assorted diffusers, softboxes, umbrellas, dishes and reflectors, radio triggers for the strobes, my Canon 1Ds Mark II, a Canon Speedlite 430EX, a Canon Speedlite 580EX, a Canon EF 50mm f/1.8 lens, a Canon EF 85mm f1.2L II USM lens, a Canon EF 70-200mm f/2.8L IS USM lens, a Canon EF 24-70 f2.8L USM lens, a Canon EF 2x II Extender, various professional Hoya filters, all of the studio backdrop equipment, a Manfrotto monopod, a Manfrotto tripod, a Leica D-Lux 4 plus accessories and the Nikon S3100 I replaced the Leica with (although not for monetary gain but because it was utterly rubbish!)

I’m sure there’s more but you get the idea?

I have considered suicide but I have a responsibility to those few that still love me and my dog. I have considered suicide but I think I’m such a fuck-up that I’d mess it up and end up as a cabbage in a hospital bed. I have considered suicide but tomorrow might be a better day.

I live in hope that tomorrow is a better day! But tomorrow never comes as we all know. There is only today. There is only today and only I have the ability to make today better.

But most days I can’t, most days I’m not strong enough.

That’s not to say I won’t, I want to, but I lack the means to make today better at the moment. A good day today means I got up, I shaved and showered, I brushed my teeth and I got dressed. That’s on a good day. A very good day meant I probably fed myself and washed up, maybe did a little cleaning, maybe took the dog for a walk. An extremely good day maybe saw me thinking about the future a little, maybe I got out to town where the people are and maybe I called up a friend for a chat.

Past that, I struggle.

That’s not to say there isn’t a plan. I’m not totally done in, just done in enough to not be able to pick myself up and dust myself down alone.

I can’t help but think about the past and the future; this just weighs me down and makes the present crap. There is so much baggage in my past and try as I might I just can’t let it go. A lot of the past put me exactly where I am now. I analyse and over-analyse. I know I can’t change it but I can’t seem to forget it either. It’s a painful circle.

The future also seems more important than the present and perhaps I’m making a mistake there too; Without some kind of success in life  I won’t be covered for retirement, I’ll never amass a decent state pension at this late stage and I’m not getting younger day-by-day. Each year I seem to feel my age more acutely than the last.

I’ll never realise my dreams through regular employment; they’re modest dreams by anyone’s standard but probably beyond the means of say, a civil servant in this financial climate. Especially a civil servant that’s never left a regularly paid job by his own volition; I realised the other day that I’ve either been sacked or been asked to resign from every job I’ve ever had. And I’ve had a lot!

I realise also that I lack having someone to love. As crass as it might seem, success means you get the pick of better women. Financial stability is probably the modern version of having the biggest club and the best furs from back in the caveman days. Very few women love a failure! The cavemen failures were the ones the mammoths trampled and the sabre-toothed tigers ate. Today’s failures are the financially and emotionally challenged.

This year has been terrible! I’m not going to live another year like this! I’m not! Either I make it next year or it’s that trip to Thailand I always spoke of… I can’t do this any more. I just can’t.

This year was worse than last which was worse than the one before that which was looking to be a pretty good year until the October.

2008 was the year it started to come together and also the year when it started to fall apart and it hasn’t got better. Two thousand and fucking eight! Just when all the hard work began to pay off the situation changed, I made a knee-jerk reaction and it was downhill all the way from there. Here and there I managed to grab a rocky outcrop or a tired old shrub on my descent but the rocks never held and the shrubs uprooted. In mountaineering parlance I need to find an old piton or cam wedged tight into the slope to belay (I probably shouldn’t mix nautical and mountaineering metaphors but it works…) my fall and give me half a chance to climb back up again.

Somehow, between now and March 2012 I need to find a minimum of £8000 ($12500). Yes, eight thousand pound to get myself back on track. I have no idea how! That’s just for the camera, a lens and a flash. I’d actually like £14400 for equipment and another £3000 to buy me some time in London but £8000 would be a start! With £8K I can start to take photos again and stop being whatever a photographer without a camera is called.

Donations gratefully accepted… Email me for my PayPal account details and you’ll have my eternal gratitude and a mention in my first biography. If it’s a good enough idea for Katie Price it’s good enough for me!

Dec 062011
 

Give me a great lighting assistant, an awesome make-up artist, a stylist that knows how to blag great costumes and style stylishly, a post production wizard that listens and I’ll be as good as any other photographer working commercially today. But; add to that a good PR company and a brilliant celebrity management team and I’ll be the Robbie Williams of the art world! I’ll be a fucking star!